The Blog that's not always wrong.

Monday, 28 November 2011

Hardly anything about Modric.

They seek him here, they seek him there.
      They luka everywhere for him.
Relax he's ill. I'm sure it's nothing serious

You know those Army training thingies where they do a 30 mile run; at night; in full kit; bags of cement in every pocket; live rounds zinging just above their heads; with both legs tied together; in their bare feet; blindfold? Now I don't have any personal experience of it, obviously, but it seems to me that it sounds like the Spurs approach to winning the league over the years.

Take the current season. You start by having your first home game cancelled because the surrounding area has been wrecked by riots, not a hazard that many teams face. Then you play the two teams tipped to be fighting it out for the title at the end of the season. Two games: nil points. 'Fixture computer and World Events target Spurs' scandal.

Then just as you get into your stride your Manager goes in for heart surgery. He's likely to be leaving soon anyway, either banged up in January for tax evasion or because he gets the England job. Please tick the box to indicate which option you prefer. Are we worried? Apparently not. The queue for the new manager's job will stretch half way to Highbury or whatever it's called these days.

Things pick up and we go on a winning streak the likes of which haven't been seen since half way through the last century. 'Glory, Glory' doesn't even come close. We cruise from bottom to third, two points behind Man.Utd with a game in hand, technically second in fact. We score two or more goals in every game and take 28 points from 30. O Ye Callous Gods of Football eat your hearts out.

But this isn't enough: we demand sterner tests. We go away from home to W.Brom without either of our iconic creatives in the squad. Van is hamstrung and Luka poorly. We then reprise our 'going behind and salvaging the points' shtick from last season. And, as we did at Fulham, we not only win it but grab the third goal to make it look easy when it wasn't.

At the Hawthorns candidates for MOM queued up again. Adebayor scored two, scrappy admittedly but it was his skill on the right that sent Lennon scurrying away from Storey who stopped him illegally at the second attempt for the penalty. Similarly it was his skill on the left that sent Defoe on his way for his brilliant solo goal. 'Adebayor the Ubiquitous' has a ring to it reminiscent of 'Conan the Destroyer'.

In the meantime he spurned several chances but he does have a tendency to be in the right place and his work rate is exceptional. His weak penalty was not held by Foster and the ball returned obligingly to him for a tap-in. The second was mis-hit but it confused the keeper sufficiently for the ball to end up into the net. Game set and match to Spurs.

Lennon was back up to speed, sorry, on either wing and seems to me to be approaching his best once again. He was MOM on some fan sites. Defoe picked up the ball in our half and ran like a bull entering the ring in search of a matador. The W.Brom defence backed off and when Jermaine saw the whites of Foster's eyes he whacked the ball into the net. 'Coup de grace' duly delivered: both ears unhesitatingly awarded.

This creates a selection dilemma for Harry if Van Der Vaart is fit for the weekend. A headache that managers always pretend they really like. My personal favourite on the day was Ekotto consistently reliable lately and especially so on a day when Walker was flaky and Kaboul and Ledley stared accusingly at each other for the goal and on several other occasions in the first half hour as W. Brom pressed. Benny stayed in position and prompted the left side throughout the game.

Parker and Sandro fighting for the same ground early in the game needed Harry to sort the midfield out at half time and after that we slowed the pace, controlled the ball, designated the parameters and dominated the half. Kaboul's volleyed clearance on the stretch which landed at Bale's feet brought him partial redemption for a wayward performance. From tiger to pussy-cat in 6 days. Bale waited for Adebayor to arrive and slipped him the ball for the third. Job done, no need to phone the building suppliers.

Every one of our top seven rivals except Chelsea dropped points and Bolton at home on Saturday is another winnable game. The difference with Spurs these days is that we are winning the winnable despite the heavy back-packs, live rounds and blindfolds, boldly going to parts of the Universe we haven't visited for some time. 'Beam us up Scotty'.

PAOK at home in the Europa on Wednesday offers us a chance to wrap up qualification early and I wonder if Harry might slip in a couple of veterans into the mix or at least have them on the bench for insurance. Two home games in a week, Mr. Ambassador, you are really spoiling us.

Luka Modric:
I can't find anything about Luka's illness or length of absence so the title of this piece is more than justified. Greg and I have discovered that if you can slip 'Modric' into the headline it increases your hits at least tenfold, so expect more of the same. Quite what it says about his popularity or our paranoia about his possible departure I'm not quite sure.

Other bloggers please note: we have patented this discovery. Don't even think about it.

In our video spot this week we highlight some amateur footage of our first goal which for some reason that escapes me You Tube hasn't blocked.
We admire your enthusiasm boys but don't give up the day job just yet.


Sunday, 27 November 2011

No Modric.. Who Needs Him .. We Do.


 Specsavers referee of the day.
Now in the Kent Pub 'Hall of Fame'

Greg is in lazy Sunday afternoon mode, relishing a Saturday afternoon victory, and the fact that every single one of our top seven rivals, except Chelsea, dropped two points. He washes the whole lot down with local beer and Steak and Abbot Ale pie. What a life!
Who ate all the pies?  Greg.
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                         The Greg Meyer Column
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 Sunday 27 November 2011 ... Teemu "Darren Anderton" Tainio's Birthday.
What The Papers Should Say ... A Cure For Altitude Sickness At Spurs.
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 What else than a Sunday lie in, a saunter up to our Pub, an early coffee before Steak and Abbot ale pie for lunch, all washed down with a leisurely ramble through the Sunday papers.
Not going to bore you with a match report but some of our number have some thought on shorts that should make the news.
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  Moments That made Our Saturday and Others That Amused Or Informed.
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 Ledley started and finished another match. The rest is obvious. Just ask the Sky commentator opining about the value of a good luck charm. He can play a bit too.
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 The little sports car again looked dangerous and was prepared to use the accelerator. It was Arron's assist for the first goal.Our little left winger is looking potent again. Obviously prefers rightside but given the double teaming on Bale the second half wing swap made sense. Bale featured on the assist sheet as well. Otherwise hardly barnstorming but he does divert opposition resources from other parts.
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 Adebayor looked up from the off. His chasing and work ethic were impressive.His finishing less clinically so but they went in twice, just. A very honourable mention to our two haircuts, Scotty and Benny. Tremendous games especially Benoit.
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 You would bet the papers will run the line that Spurs won without their two big guns. Moddle and VDV. as well. Spurs can play better but won anyway. Music to our lawyer's ears. Sounds a little like tabloidal thoughts usually reserved for Man United. Maybe this new Spurs is the real deal. Third last week and still there after a prickly away assignment.
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 Talking of Man United. Nothing warms the cockles of our Tranmere Accountant's heart than the sight of an apopopelctic Sir Ferguson in full red nose rant mode. Usually means daylight robbery has occurred at Old Trafford. Newcastle did us a good turn with a fortunate draw.
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 And further on the subject of refereeing. Not Mike Jones at OT but Lee Probert surprised all here with a respectable display at the Hawthorns yesterday. His penalty decisions were correct and he earnt respect with a composed display. Even when the game got edgy.
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 As well the yellow card he gave to Mulumbu after the Congolese called for one following an incident with Sandro was priceless. Demonstrated proper referee largesse in complying with the said request.
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 Firstly Youssouf remember old English proverb, be careful what you wish for. Secondly it is a pet hate of our cabbie here, so he thinks good on you Lee. It may be a new directive from on high or just excellent proactive refereeing from Mr. Probert. Said he had a good game.
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 The icing on the cake was made in Holland but occurred just down the road from White Hart lane. Martin Jol's Fulham almost made it but the draw with Arsenal was great for Spurs.
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So Sounds Like A Lazy Afternoon Here At A Kent Pub. 
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 Debate will prosper here this Sunday arvo. Mine host says thats why they play games at the proper Saturday afternoon time. Gives you time to bask in the glory ( that word again Danny B.) of Tottenham Hotspur on a leisurely Sunday.
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We will spare a round as well for the man who rivals Darren Anderton for most appearances at the Chigwell Lodge treatment rooms. Now of New York Bulls Tainio Teemu is 32 today.
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 Cheers ... Daniel Blanchflower had these Sundays in 1960-61 ... our best start since then ... Greg Meyer.        coys.

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And now in response to overwhelming demand, Ledley King speaks. This was just before the W. Brom game. We are unbeaten with Ledley in the team this season.

When Ledley's in the driving seat
the Mighty Spurs they don't get beat.

Friday, 25 November 2011

Dear Roman ... Condolences . Cheerfully Luka.


Exactly  a month to go until you know 'Ho'.  Greg is in receipt of  another missive from Luka. It's not 'what you know' as they say. He brings us up to date on things Chelsea who have hit a little stormy weather which may or may not turn into a tsunami but we live in hope. We are hoping not to get entangled at the Hawthorns on Saturday and a new manager may be Hiddink in the undergrowth at Stamford Bridge. But enough of the pathetic puns and on with the motley Mr. Meyer.
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Shaping up: Ivan Modric hopes to be a bigger player
than his dad when he grows up.

                                     The Greg Meyer Column
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 Linda Laflamme's Birthday .. Friday 25 November 2011.. Rock On.
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Dear Roman .. Condolences .. Cheerfully Yours Luka.
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In the warm Mediterranean July sunshine aboard Eclipse, the world's largest private yacht, (at 164 metres long it would overhang our beloved Lane pitch by a minimum 64 metres), it was all Croatian and Russian bonhomie. Captain Abramovich had his eyes on charting Chelsea upwards.A new crew member in midfield.The simple matter of 24 million pounds and Tottenham Hotspur's most prized asset moved to a London rival. Fait accompli ! As Arsene would say.



Enter Daniel Levy and the rest is not merely history but fast entering Spurs folklore. Much to our present unabated joy the ship Luka never left the port. So it was not surprising when our Luka Modric Appreciation Society ( Official Kent Pub Branch) received the following copy missive this week. 
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 Another Letter From Luka.

 Dear Roman,


                 Hvala again or as you say in Russia, please pass the Vodka bottle. Yes understand why you need it at present.Shame that nice young Mr. Boas is not off to bestest start.


Luka, Mrs Luka and littlest Luka thank you for wonderful holiday on your very big yacht. Little Luka still talks about the fun playing coits and deck football. Well he helped watch from his stroller whilst mummy and daddy played a Croatian version of the same game in our very very big bedroom cabin.


Luka's agent says to say very sorry Mr. Levy lost key to Tottenham dressing room window. Seems by the time the key was located it was a little late. You know what its like. Holiday lag perhaps.


No like to cock-a doodle-do but chicken badge doing very well so far.


Seems us Croatians can jump to silly early conclusions.Chicken badge with little Scotty Parker, retro all round ,doing rather well.He is still talking about those early McDonalds ads in dressing room and whats worse in huddle on pitch. Benny doesn't listen or understand even when he gets to huddle. Not sure which is worse haircut Benny or Scotty.


As to room sharing with Mr. Terry.


Again seems Mrs Luka was right about Luka sharing room with Mr. John. Mind no one in Zagreb believes a word about him and Anton. Then again not sure if they know who Anton is.


My new found close personal friend Daniel is still threatening me.


Now its about signing a contract of 100,000 pounds per week. Mrs Luka still talking to mother in Zagreb about that. Might drag on a little.


What can Luka say?


All normal agent public relations spin going on. All normal tabloid fodder stuff. But me and Niko( remember him .. very good and handsome midfield attacker), and Vedran( also very movie star looks) had great trip to Turkey and home recently. No laugh but Vedran scored a goal. So out of that in your times of trouble wise old Croatian saying comes to mind.


A Croation Proverb To Help Chelsea.


A couple in fact.


For poor old Andre V-B ..

                                    

                                   Bez muke nema nauke

                                                                        Without suffering there is no learning.


Vedran says Chelsea fans hope learning comes quicker and start winning.


For Daniel Levy and probably Roman Abramovich too.


                                  Bolje vrabacu ruci, nego golaub grani

                                                                                        A sparrow in your hand is better than a pidgeon in the bush.


Daniel is the one laughing.He keeps going on about someone called Edith Piaf. Apparently genius midfielder in Paris team.


Am closing with fondest regards Roman but


 Mrs Luka is very happy at afternoon tea parties with Sandra, ( Harry is never there), Sylvie and Damien, ( Rafa usually working on troublesome hamstring),and Ledley brings his son along so that he has someone to kick the football with. Dad only plays on weekend.


Hope things work out, but not too much. I am sure that nice young Mr, Villas will try hard. Oh I see Mr. Guus has his mobile turned on . But then again you already knew that.



                                Cheers and Condolences,


                                                                         Luka, Mrs Luka and littlest Luka.



Meanwhile At A kent Pub.


Still basking in the glory( thanks Daniel Blanchflower) of a very classy display against Villa. No judge of what's ahead though.


West Brom will press, harry , kick and shove. So if our credentials to altitude sickness bear any merit then Spurs must win at the prickly Hawthorn venue.


Our pub think yes. The team ethic and spirit dictates that the real, new Spurs should be there. If so then alls well.


Pretty good here at our Pub. Hope alls well with you.


Cheers ... Kent Pub proverb ...


                                            "Turn up, play the Spurs way and the result takes care of itself."


Great time to be a Spur ...     Greg Meyer.   coys.
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 Linda La-who? I hear you cry. Well here in Greg and Jimmy's undying committment to lifelong musical education is late 60's early 70's Rock, Jazz, Folk icons 'It's a beautiful Day' featuring Linda and husband Dave on violin with 'White Bird'. It's a classic. trust me I was there. The 60's that is not Los Angeles. Many people's favourite song of all time. Oh yes it is.

Recorded live in 2008




Wednesday, 23 November 2011

Just what the doctor ordered.


                                           Anyone seen my team?
                             They were with me when I got off the bus.

The JimmyG2 Column


 I assume that there must be better feelings the day after Spurs gave Villa the run-around to slip past Chelsea and Newcastle to go third. Beating City and Man.Utd for the title for example. But this self satisfied glow will certainly do for now. You could call Monday's evening stroll in the park just what the doctor ordered for Harry and fans alike.

Tempratures are rising: unbeaten in nine; won the last four; 2nd to City in the form table;W.Brom on Saturday; confidence factor at max; opponents fear factor in overdrive; Harry back; Stadium almost viable; good chance of progressing in the Europa. It's not a bad time to be a Spurs supporter. I can remember better times, but only just. Remember that is.

Defoe did his England credentials more good sitting on the bench than Bent and Agbonlahor did by playing. This was virtually a walk-over, a no-show by Villa with whom we have some lively games in the recent past. But not on this occasion. We played all the football: they went walk about presumably inspecting the beauty spots, the riot damage, or the new stadium clearances on the Tottenham High Road.

In fact the Police have been notified of their disappearance and anyone spotting eleven bedraggled also- rans in claret and blue wandering around N17 should contact Alex McLeish immediately. Their game plan to double up on our Gareth and to put Alan Hutton in charge was the wrong diagnosis and backfired spectacularly, as we all knew it would, and quite early in the game.

For the third game running we went in at half time 2-0 up and for the fourth game running we scored an early first goal. Exactly how Tottenham fans of a nervous disposition or recovering from heart operations like it.

Defeating Villa cemented the gap opening up between the top seven and the rest and even at this early stage of the season there are clear indications where the main combatants for the honour are. Harry reckons that we are Premiership contenders ourselves. This could of course be post operation euphoria but at 2.2 points per game normally we wouldn't be far out.

The difficulty of selecting a single MOM indicates another great ensemble performance. Bale Van, Adebayor, Modric, and Kaboul were all outstanding; the rest were just excellent. Personally I always tick the Modric box unless he's clearly under par or if someone plays an absolute blinder.

Starting from deep which is where I like to see him, he carried the ball more and more incisively as the game went on and was always available to link up play and relaunch the attack. Adebeyor was more than willing, running the channels; he scored two and missed a couple more and could easily have had his first Premiership hat-trick.

We played some delightful football, controlled the ball and the pace in some style and apart from a couple of minutes at the start and five minutes at the beginning of the second half hardly broke sweat and always had the comfort of another gear if needed,

Bale was almost back to his best and supplied both assists, though the first for Ade's spectacular scissors strike, was a little fortunate. Scott Parker did his thing in midfield and in a tribute Ledley reckons he does half his work for him. All the defenders seemed to be nurturing our club captain and Kaboul was particularly strong in the air. 'Leave it us Ledders; you have a rest mate'.

The togetherness of the pre-match hug seems to spill over into the game but it's easy to be mates or contented supporters for that matter when you're winning. What we are clearly lacking at the moment is a new scape-goat now that Jermaine Jenas has gone on loan to Villa. Some unkind fan suggested that we insist on Jenas playing against us although he was technically ineligible.

Gomes, once the next in line, has kept three clean sheets in the three games that he has played. Perhaps we don't need one at the moment. But don't forget that Jenas could be back so perhaps we will keep the scapegoat's seat warm for him.

Was this our best performance of the season? Possibly, although Aston Villa were pleasingly disappointing. Their game plan was to avoid getting beaten but even when this was clearly not an option after the first Adebeyor goal on 14 minutes they didn't, or rather couldn't, change their mind set.

The most outstanding feature of the defence was without doubt Benny's hair. This style was clearly inspirational and might catch on amongst the team unless it is banned by the FA. for ungentlemanly conduct.

News Roundup:
Harry has been nominated for the England job by Steve McClaren which is like Snow White being given the poisoned apple by the wicked Queen.

Defoe scored 5 in a friendly against a Charlton X1. Just in case anyone had forgotten him. he’s the little fella that comes on when Van starts to flag. Eerily on exactly the same day as he scored his last five against Wigan (22nd November. 2009) Where will he be on Nov.22nd 2013? Not playing against us I hope.

Crocodile tears spot:
Man City lost to Napoli and are in danger of dropping down to the Europa.
Man.Utd are not certain to proceed either.
Let's hear it for Manchester.

Adebeyor's Wages.
He wants to stay now that Harry has given him his life back, but his financial commitments to his charity foundation in Africa prevent him from taking a wage cut.
Excellent stuff. So pay him what Modric is on next season (£100.000 or whatever) and pay the rest direct to his African charities. Simples, everyone happy except the tax man, which is why it probably can't happen.

Video spot
A little tribute to Spurs Musings favourite player. Oh come on! We haven't had one for ages.


Sunday, 20 November 2011

When Harry met Daniel and other job interviews.


 Any bets on this re-union at White Hart Lane?


Greg appears as 'deep throat' Meyer, this time, going underground for the inside story of the comings and goings in the courts and  in the boardroom: of the wheeler dealings above even Harry's head. He bestrides the whole of Europe and ranges from South Korea to Turkey, from the attractions of birthday girl Bo Derrick, to the Tottenham High Rd. Never mind the quality feel the width.

               The Greg Meyer Column
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20 November 2011 ... A Sex Symbol Turns 55 ... Surely Not.



When Harry Met Daniel Who Met Carlo Who Met Gus ... Another Job Interview.
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First it was the elegant Italian reclining outside the Chairman's palatial office suite,High Road Tottenham. So what's an avuncular looking Dutchman doing in the same spot sporting a natty bowtie and an engraved watch bearing the inscription "All the best from your Chelsea Team 2009." Two days later in May 2009 it was the said elegant Italian interviewee that took over the Chelsea job as our Dutchman returned to Russia.Small world. Ironic world.
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Within the mandatory briefcase (embossed in gold with the Initials G.H. as if you hadn't already guessed) nestling in the Dutchman's lap is an illustrious Curriculm Vitae. Probably second to none. Unlike Carlo there is a glowing testimonial from Roman Abramovich. Indeed that might be a clue to the size of the task facing our Daniel in obtaining the services of the well credentialled Herr Hiddink.
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On the World stage he is a national hero in South Korea, would probably get the Aussie prime-ministership if he wanted it, as well as a semi finalist with Holland. On the club level successful at Chelsea and a European Cup winner managing PSV just to name a few.
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Too big, too successful, and too expensive for Spurs? Despite his recent Turkish Euro belly up at the hands of our Luka and others, a manager of his calibre, his charisma, his undoubted man maneagement skills and head for the big stage make him very sought after.
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So why the suggestions of discrete discussions over the management structure at our North London club. Of course most recently the manager causing the fuss was Senor Villas-Boas and his chasing of a certain Spurs superstar.
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The L. Factor.
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Not our Luka this time but a certain Judge Anthony Leonard QC is the cause of managerial cogitations and those somewhat subdued evening meals at Chez Sandbanks. Sandra's culinary expertise is being called upon to keep spirits up. Nothing to do with her undoubted talent at scoring unmissable headers this time. Ironically enough young Darren Bent does crop up next at the Lane on Monday night.
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Henry James Redknapp has an away match set for 23 January 2012 at the Southwark Crown Court.With the Storrie and Mandaric recent tax case being finalised, apparently in favour of  the away respondents (some cause for encouragement for Team Redknapp no doubt) then the reporting ban has been lifted.
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Our pub lawyer reckons it is not an easy one to call.A common Crown tactic of hoping the mud belonging to a co defendant is sufficient to stick fatally on the other is possibly in play. As well seems there is a torturous paper chase extending from England, Florida and Monaco at least.
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Was the alleged transfer to Mr. Redknapp merely a loan or as the Crown seem to assert a payment upon which tax was due. Certainly not an easy one to call this far out. Particularly with a reporting ban having just been lifted. The heat is on in a certain Sandbanks kitchen.


Much easier to call and swapping hospitals and court rooms for a familiar dugout, welcome back Harry to White Hart Lane for the coming of the football Villains. 
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A Quick Look Around At A Kent Pub.
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It's tight for third at the moment. If we beat Villa then we join Chelsea on third with a game in hand. So long as Liverpool fall at the Stamford Bridge today.Newcastle also on third have begun their descent says our flower gardner.
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We have the classier attack, and with you know who still at centre back then surely enough to snuff out the threat of Mrs Sandra Bent and Gabby Unspellable. Both doing well so far for Villa.
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Speaking of our centre back Rolls Royce surely a candidate for the Oops ,I'll Say That Again Differently Department. Reports this week were talking of an England return. Look after his last World Cup 45 minutes(his only game) lets just hope there are enough games on the meter this year for a Spurs return next year says our cabbie.
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After two weeks on International holiday our pub are just looking forward to seeing Van Man, Gareth, Luka, Ade, Little Scotty, new found superstar Kyle and a host of others. A mouthwatering prospect.
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Speaking of superstars. For all you cricket lovers Australia have just unearthed a fast bowling superstar. Pat Cummings, 3 years younger than Gareth Bale, has just taken 6/79against South Africa on debut. His fourth first class match.Mind S. A. will probably romp in with a Test victory.
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Before we go, that sexy 55 year old birthday. Bo Derek who our pub playboy, Mine Host, says has aged beautifully.


Cheers ... great to have some proper football back ... Greg meyer.     coys.

 And now just to prove that Greg's abilities extend beyond just football here is the aforesaid Bo Derrick strutting her stuff on the beach. He sure can pick 'em. A winner every time. Not bad for 55 though when this was filmed I'm not sure.
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Saturday, 19 November 2011

Not quite as dead as a parrot

Takover rumour;
Well rumours have to start somewhere
and with our history this is more likely than an Arab sheik 


What a disaster and divisive distraction the Olympic Stadium land grab has been. Now with the accusations about surveillance of the Olympic Committee and the revelations about Karen Brady's phone calls the stinking pit gets deeper and smellier.

We seem to have slipped off the moral high ground into a swamp of intrigue and manoeuvring worthy of FIFA at its most devious. Only Seb Blatter's latest racist idiocy has kept us from the front pages but when the case comes up again next week unless the Euro collapses or Sir Alec Ferguson retires we may find ourselves in the full glare of of some unwelcome publicity.

Let me say firstly that the team are doing really well; that I wish Harry a speedy return to the dugout and full health; that Levy and ENIC have done a decent job for Spurs and that I wish to see no man's head on a platter unless of course they are found guilty of wrongdoing and then I want their head with  a Cox's Orange Pippin in their mouth on a bed of finely shredded Iceberg lettuce.

But with Harry in court one week and Levy the next it doesn't look good for our Lily-white image does it? I'm sure we will adopt the James Murdoch defence: 'I wasn't there; I don't remember; it wasn't me and what was the question again? But to lose a Manager would look like misfortune: to lose a Manager and a Chief Executive would look like carelessness.

I am pretty sure that we are in the clear on all these matters. As shrewd an operator as Daniel Levy will have thought to wear at least two pairs of gloves on this occasion. Everything will have been done on need to know basis, on the basis of deniability and that no tapes exist or smoking e-mails. .

It looks as if the phone records were 'blagged' not hacked so it's not quite a hanging offence. It was probably not by PKR Forensic Accountants themselves either. Perhaps the tapes were bought in a job lot when the News of the World had a closing down sale. At least two distances removed from THFC anyway.

Everything that could go wrong in the pursuit of the OS has gone wrong. How much it has cost in legal fees and in terms of delay with the NPD is anyone's guess. At least it exposes the overdone myth of the Machiavellian Genius that masquerades as Daniel Levy. If this was a horse-race we would have fallen at the first fence broke a fetlock and been shot.

Forensic Accountants, arrests, a continuing vendetta with W.Ham, it's not so much how it will end up but how it looks in the meantime. What is the likely effect on the team and its current members; on prospective players; on Boris and Haringey Council in pursuit of funds for the once again almost viable NPD; on Jan Brewer, Harry Hawkins and co? All unknowable at this stage.

Something smells and the dustbin needs not only emptying but thoroughly cleaning. It's more about appearances at this stage and to me it doesn't look good.



Jimmy's lightning round up.

Racism. The new corruption in the case of Mr. Seb Blatter who doesn't understand his own rules and principles. Racism on the pitch doesn't exist apparently and where it does it can be settled by a handshake. Easy for a rich, old, foolish,white man to say.

Modric is to be out first £100k player subject to two provisos. (1) That we make the Champion's League. (2) That he's still with us at the end of the season.
Two very much intertwined provisos by the look of it.

Scott Parker and Kyle Walker were each made MOM's in their appearances for the full England squad against Spain and Sweden. Sincere congratulations to both. Will Walker make the squad? Johnson, Richards, Smalling? Less than a 50/50 chance I would say. Will Scotty? I doubt any bookie will give you odds against that happening.

THFC decouple from Stock Exchange AIM market.
Apparently this gives us more flexibility to raise funds ( it says here).
So imminent takeover by Arabs or MOSSAD whichever seem the likeliest or it opens the way for Uncle Joe in the Bahamas (edit) to put a wedge in and finance the NPD and sell the club once the new Stadium is built.

Aston Villa. Oh yes I nearly forgot about the football.
We beat them 2-1 twice last season and Van scored them all. We just might do better on Monday. We are at home; King and Parker our current talisman are likely to play, and Van Der Vaart could be fit enough to start at least.
If they don't Gallas, Sandro and Defoe are rarin' to step up. In addition Lawrenson tips us to win which he has done for the last 8 games and wasn't far wrong.

So Spurs 3-1 it is then.

And now by way of light relief the 'Dead Parrot' sketch from Monty Python.
I only wish that the Olympic Stadium was as dead as the Norwegian Blue but I fear not.
Unlike the parrot this may run and run.



Sunday, 13 November 2011

Scott Parker and PoppyCock

'No pasaran':  'They shall not pass'

The JimmyG2 Column


 Let the record show that England beat the World and European champions 1-0. It was more Dunkirk than the charge of the Light Brigade but the score will remain in the record books when the performance is long forgotten, fortunately.

The Spanish performance was one that Spurs fans will identify with: dominate the play and lose to a set piece goal. We were at home true; they didn't seem to be too bothered, that's the fourth friendly they've lost recently; we parked a fleet of buses and broke out on commando raids occasionally, especially in the first half. But the score remains for ever at 1-0.

The fact that they started with their second eleven barely registered such is the quality of their squad. But, but, but we were without Rooney, Ferdinand, Terry and Gerrard, stalwarts in the recent past of the England squad. Actually this turned out to be an advantage.

We rode our luck at both ends of the pitch: Darren Bent hit the post with a header with Reina flapping and the ball span across the goal for, captain for the day, Lampard to score. David Villa hit the post with Hart beaten at the other end but it spun away to safety. 'Narrow Margins' as my primary school teacher used to say.

But if the objective of the game is to score more than your opponents rather than to delight, impress and entertain then we more than fulfilled our objectives. We expect Spurs to entertain, nay demand it, on our way to Glory. Glory, but England ? That's not a demand that England fans put high on their list of priorities. An efficient or even fortuitous victory is the limit of our ambitions at the moment.

An additional pleasure for us was that Scotty was named MOM. His tackling and work rate were certainly better than most and his passing no worse than anybody elses. Icing? You want icing? You're lucky to get cake in these recessionary times. Kyle Walker got his first cap though I'm not sure he touched the ball in his 15 minutes of fame. Will that do?

The build up to the game was more PoppyCock than PoppyGate but it clearly stiffened the sinews and summoned up the blood of this young English side and spurred them on. The sight of the Prime Minister and the next in line but one to the Throne and probably David Beckham somewhere in the background was a clear call to arms.

With nine players taking the field at some stage on Saturday under 25, and Jones, Walker, Rodwell and Welbeck 20, or under, the barometer may be set fair for several years to come. Even Rooney, Young and Cahill are only 26. I could even get to look forward to watching the England team without Terry and Cole  and the other old stagers on the pitch

The intervention of a Tory backbencher who is also a qualified referee, a rare and probably dying breed, lends weight to the conspiracy theorists' view that this was an attempt to emasculate our boys. He proposed the now famous 'Armband Compromise' and I was amazed not to see him knighted on the pitch by Prince William himself at half time. 'Arise Sir Christopher Heaton Harris'

The alternative view that the original culprit was Health and Safety on the grounds that those little pins are very sharp and would present a clear and present danger in a close contact situation seemed more likely. Except that it was pretty accurately forecast that we would have difficulty locating the Spanish players let alone get to close quarters with them, except for our Scotty that is.

Fresh from the triumphs of PoppyGate it was a weekend to remember. The award of the World Athletics Championship in 2017 seals the Olympic Stadium 'legacy' fate and I'm not sure that even W.Ham will want it now. I'm pretty sure that we didn't really want it from the start and it's a high calibre bullet dodged in my view. Let the NPD begin.

The announcement that the Harry and Mandaric trial is set for January 20th or thereabouts just before the Man. City game, unless Harry can get a doctor's note throws further uncertainty into our Champions' League attempt along with the probable renewal of the Modric saga; the injury to Van Der Vaart; and ITK's rising from their crypts to clean the January window.

In the meantime we have several winnable games starting with Villa at home on Monday week before we face Chelsea just before Xmas, then newcomers Swansea and Norwich and the rescheduled Everton game before the whole Merry-Go-Round starts again. 2 points per game is Premiership winning form I'm told but I haven't bothered to work it out yet. As if.

But in truth when I look at the fixture list there seem to be far fewer games that give me cause for trepidation than there used to be. Are our opponents getting worse; are we getting better; or am I getting overconfident? Answers on an armband please.

Historical footnote: 'No Pasaran' and 'They shall not pass'. The words of the Spanish Republicans during the Spanish Civil War and by coincidence the words associated with the Battle of Verdun in WW1 in 1916. Scotty knows his history.

 And now our 'video spot'.
Kyle and Scotty talk on the eve of the Spain game.
Scott has come straight from auditioning for 'Casualty' and Kyle's forearm is available for renting as advertising space, but you need to act quickly before it all gets filled up.
Down to earth stuff and how right they were. Out of the mouths of babes and veterans.


Tuesday, 8 November 2011

You lucky people!


'The more I practice the luckier I get '

The JimmyG2 column


For over 20 yrs from the mid fifties Fulham's Chairman was the comedian Tommy Trinder. He was President of the club until his death at 80yrs old in 1989. His catchphrase, 'You lucky people', could no doubt be heard resounding around the great Stadium in the Sky on Sunday night after his beloved team, though themselves no mugs on this performance were nevertheless mugged in the great Fulham High Road smash and grab raid.

Which raises the question 'How lucky were Spurs?' Practically every report of the game contains the word 'luck'. But the words 'good luck' bear  closer examination. It's not lucky to have a player on the post at corners. It's not luck to have an experienced keeper whose positioning meant that every shot seemed to go straight at him.

Nor was there anything lucky about any of our goals.. Once again Lennon set up Bale and Bale set up Lennon to put us two up at half time. These were the result of rapid counter attacking and clever inter-passing.

Walker did brilliantly to get onto Adebayor's wide layoff the find Lennon with the cut- back. His incisive ball across the goal evaded Adebayor but found Bale whose fierce goal bound shot was diverted into the goal by Baird.

For the second a delightful return ball by Bale found Lennon in enough space to intimidate Fulham with his pace and his swerving run enabled him to score inside the far post reminiscent of Bale against Milan.

The third goal was the reult of clever hold up play by Adebayor as we ran the clock down and an instinctive strike by Defoe in full view of Capello. Not that it did him any good as he is not in the England squad for the upcoming friendlies.

We even had to score their goal for them when Ledley's header cannoned of Kaboul for their only goal. Of course when your keeper is MOM that tells at least part of the story. But many people will tell you that there is 'no such thing as luck'; that you make your own luck; that good luck is the result of hard work, good planning, and circumstances.

Gary Player was once accused of being a lucky golfer. He replied that the more he practised the luckier he seemed to get. There are plenty of proverbs around the world to support this view. As the Hungarians say, 'The brave have all the luck', or as the Scottish put it, 'Diligence is the mother of good luck'. 'Fortune favours the brave' as we have it in everyday terms. Our attacking style personified by Walker is nothing if not brave; not to say foolhardy at times.

There is no doubt that Fulham played well, the Craven Cottagers, which is not as sexy as it sounds, moved the ball quickly in midfield and rendered Parker less able to put tackles in and therefore less effective. The blow to the head from Sidwell might have affected him more than was at first apparent and could be the subject of review.

But bear  in mind that over aseason these episodes of apparent luck even themselves up. Carl Walker not only handled the ball he adopted it and put its name down for Eton. But Scott Parker was pushed to the ground by Sidwell on the edge of the area and the ref. missed that too.

Ironically the phrase, “Overpaid, overfed, oversexed, and over here.” said of American serviceman in Britain during WW2 is attributed to Tommy Trinder and might well have echoed round Craven Cottage after Brad Friedel's display.

He was Chairman of Fulham when the maximum wage was abolished and made Johnny Haynes the first £100 p.w. player in line with a promise he had made earlier before the wage limit had been raised.

 Trivial pursuit Question 
When was the last time in England that opposing professional football teams fielded two American goalkeepers with a combined age of 79?


We limited Modric's impact by playing the ball carelessly out of defence and cutting out the middle man. He was so miffed that at one point that he went and stood against the left hand post in a sulk and inadvertently saved a certain goal.

Zamora again impressed with his hold up play and Dembele was good on the ball. Both of these might be useful additions to the squad, though neither are prolific scorers. Danny Murphy was as industrious and clever as always but he like Bobby Zamora. made little impact when he was at Tottenham.

But the table doesn't lie and we are where we are. The police are still looking for the International gang that carried out this daring raid in broad daylight. Locals described them as a 'disorganised ragbag who got lucky', but we know differently.

Conspiracy theorists' corner
Harry undergoing a heart operation just as his court case is due to begin? Out for a couple of days, then a couple of weeks and possibly until Xmas.

Note: the Gary Player quote is sometimes attributed to Arnold Palmer, Lee Trevino and Musings favourite Sam Goldwyn.

New in the Spurs shop:
Miniature cast of Ledley's knee on a key ring to act as a 'good luck' charm.
You might need it but Spurs certainly don't.
Six appearances six wins. Lucky? I don't think so.

And here's another glimpse of how lucky we are: lucky to have such a mercurial player as Aaron Lennon rapidly returning to form. 2 minutes of exhilerating skill and no lack of end product.

I was going to include one of our ever popular clips from the past of Tommy Trinder on stage. But it was so awful not even a connoisseur of such archive stuff as myself could watch it.
So enjoy Aaron instead.

'You lucky people!'





Saturday, 5 November 2011

So long Bassong


Under the spotlight. Sebastien in happier days.
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 The Greg Meyer column.

Greg's read the entrails, studied the runes and examined the charts and has come to the conclusion that we might just win on Sunday. He's not impressed with our Russian expedition but then why would he be. His forensic analysis pinpoints Sebastien Bassong as the cause of our downfall and nobody at Spurs Musings is going to disagree. So with a little History, a dash of Geography, and a smattering of Nostalgia Greg presents his usual Potpourri of entertainment.
Book now for Xmas.
Saturday 5 November ...Saint Nayim Day.



Sebastien Swansong ... Martin Jol Revisited.
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 An accident waiting to happen did happen. Again. Sad but true. An unfortunate football story.



 The moment his second touch turned into one fatally too many, collective hearts here at our pub sank. You knew what was coming next. A frantic recovery lunge was easily categorised as a clear foul. In very dangerous indeed fatal territory as it turned out.


Memories of that not long ago clumsy penalty give away sprang to mind. Look he's probably a lovely bloke and yes has been loyal to the cause.Yes he's there given our frugal health in the centre back department presently.


His timing earlier in the week was uncannily accurate. Shame about his efforts in Russia. In the Standard on Thursday he outlined his situation. In essence it was his Spurs days are numbered regretfully so.


So long Bassong could have been the headline then and especially soon.


Yes Russia was hardly down to Sebastien but more so to having no cutting edge in the second string locker. Still should qualify for the next European round which was no doubt noted at a small Spanish village with eternal Spurs connections.
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 The Goal That Went All The Way from Paris to White Hart Lane.

 In the last minute of extra time in the UEFA Cup Final 1995 Mohammed Ali Amar better known as Nayim launched one from the half way line. Straight and true it flew over the cuckoos nest that was David Seamans head. Real Zaragoza 1 Arsenal 0.


Deep in the Aragonese in the little village of Trasmos, at number 44 'Gol de Nayim' Street lies our Spanish sister pub. Not sure if Nayim is a regular but not hard to guess who the locals venerate if they have named a street after him. Nayim and Spurs in that order. Birthday drinks today for a 45 years young Nayim.


But we should not linger as the Spurs of today would make Nayim proud with expectation.
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 A Day At the Cottage.

 A great day for conspiracy theories with superstition galore.


Martin Jol to avenge his mismanaged departure. A host of ex Spurs to score. Bobby Zamora, Danny Murphy, Stephen Kelly, Simon Davies (bung knee makes it difficult).


Our pub are just disappointed that Senderos is out injured. The ex Arsenal accident will be missed. No Send in the Clowns theme music. They still seem to be doing the same musical theatre down back at Arsenal says our gardener.


The long Spurs trip to Russia theory and the full strength Fulham team mid week.Ergo they will be tired and our first team non travellers will be fresh. Bollocks says our cabbie. All will be fresh for both teams on Sunday.


Peter Walton is a non controversial choice for our pub. Always looks as though he should have retired 20 years ago but hope for some of the elders at our pub. Age is no barrier.


Surely Ade is due a goal, Lennon is on an upward spiral and hopefully Sandro gets some decent minutes. Our pub are immune to conspiracy theories but do believe in class over cottage industry.
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 Cheers ... lets dedicate a hoped for win to a 45 year old legend and a 64 year old recovering manager ... Greg Meyer.     coys. 
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 And for the birthday boy, Nayim, who played 114 games for us and scored 18 times here's that goal. Enjoy.


Friday, 4 November 2011

A steppe too far.

 Straight on at the traffic lights in Moscow Central.


Well the boys finally ran out of road, sank without trace and hit the buffers in the Europa. Actually that's a metaphor too far because it wasn't quite a train wreck although without Cudocini's performance it might, from a distance, have looked like one.

Certainly the trip to Russia was a steppe too far. Ironically they scored the only goal of the game from a well taken free kick just as we had done at WHL. Unfortunately it was the result of a careless touch and clumsy foul on the edge of the area by Bassong who did little to endear himself to sceptical Tottenham fans.

This was not designed to assist Harry's recovery from a double stent operation and we can only hope that he wasn't watching at that moment. He was rumored to be returning fresh for the weekend game at Fulham but this has been put back until after another International break.

Conspiracy theorists are already reading dire implications into this setback and theorising as to the possible implications for Harry's England career. As operations go it is at the minor end of the scale according to my medical encyclopedia but that won't stop the doom-mongers fretting.

It was a game of cat and mouse, in which we were cast in the the role of the rodents. Rubin watched us from the safety of the sofa as we wrinkled up our little noses but every time we sniffed the cheese they cuffed us back into our own territory and then gradually advanced more effectively themselves especially down the flanks.

We failed to make a single strike on goal or force a single corner. Cudocini made six excellent saves and we endured eight corners. In hindsight we were well beaten but in real time it didn't seem quite so bad.

Carroll and Livermore combined well in midfield and Fredericks made some good breaks later in the game. Townsend is no full back but with Rose injured we had little option if we were trying to conserve our best players for the Premiership. Falque did OK and might have scored or set up an equaliser late in the game.

Livermore, now very much a senior, went to centre half when Gallas went off after putting in a good session in midfield. But everyone's passing went off as Rubin put us under increasing pressure as the game progressed. Disappointing in the end but not a disgrace by any means. This was another seminar in the educational progress of our youngsters and some of them are still showing signs of making the grade.

Defoe did well to wrestle the ball from two defenders and put a ball across the six yard box that cried out for a tap in but Pavlyuchenko had given the chance up and responded too late. A part from a signature 30yd blast that was well wide these were the only chances that came our way.

There was little service to the two experienced front men and they are not the types to make things happen on their own. Gallas played well until he downed tools and did that sitting on the pitch thing which is clearly a signal to the bench that he has had enough. Exhaustion rather than injury according to reports.

Piennar returning from injury played the full 90 mins. But an hour might have been a better idea and he showed little that he will turn out to be anything but ordinary. He was lucky not to receive a yellow card as I counted at least six fouls. He was more off the pace than combative but clearly needs more time.

We have an away game at Shamrock and a home tie with PAOK and should make the next stage but it's finely poised with th top three teams within apoint of each other. We may have to include some of the big boys to ensure progress in the final game though Harry might be content to let the second eleven finish what they have started.

Thoughts turn to Fulham on Sunday and if the table doesn't lie then we should take the three points even away from home. The managership of Martin Jol will give added edge to this derby. The team that won at QPR will almost certainly start with Sandro on the bench to come on if things need shoring up later.

So 2-1 Spurs it is then.

No videos of the game available but here is a short animation of a heart stent operation .
Our thoughts are with you Harry.


Tuesday, 1 November 2011

The Colossus of White Hart Lane

 Who's that mate, Scotty or Dave?


Another expected routine victory against QPR . The first four words in that opening statement are not ones that you could easily apply to Tottenham until recently. But they are now, and some very decent football as icing on the cake. Actually make that as a firm foundation for our current progress.

Of course there was a drizzle of hesitancy after half time to spice up the mixture and a pinch of slapdash in front of goal to add zest to the fans' enjoyment. But with Bale scoring twice and Lennon chipping in with a couple of assists there was much to admire especially in the first half.

Adebayor might have scored and it should all have been wrapped up by half time. Ledley played a full game and made it five wins in five appearances. Scott Parker, of whom more later, has never been on the losing side in his Spur's career.Early days,early days.

The difficulty of picking a MOM suggests a good team performance. Van Der Vaart was increasingly effective, scored one and should have had another and played the full game. Modric was once again the beating heart and usually someone has to play out of their skin to better him.

The general theory is that Scott Parker was that man. So carried away were some people, including Harry, that comparisons with Dave Mackay came up. Now any Spurs player that makes three firm tackles in a single game always raises the inevitable question: 'Is he the new Dave Mackay?'

We did it to Wilson Palacios; then Sandro and now Scott Parker. However I saw Dave Mackay on many occasions and have to tell you that he was tougher than Parker and much more skilful and was not lacking in the 'vision' thing.. He played for Tottenham for the best part of a decade playing 318 times and scoring 51 goals.

He also lifted Billy Bremner up by his lapels and was acclaimed by George Best as the toughest player he ever played against. So you don't just have to take my word for it. The man is a Spurs legend. Scott Parker has played seven times for Tottenham and comparisons in any way whatsoever are a tad premature. Seven games do not a legend make.

He played well against QPR and was largely responsible for the disappearance of Adel Taarabt at half time to spend more time with his delusions. But he was no more than competent in his previous two games.

Anyone who takes the weight off Van Der Vaart and Modric and gives them time and space to play gets my vote but don't hang Dave Mackay around his neck. It's an embarrassment and an encumbrance that Scott Parker certainly doesn't need.

Harry precise words were : "Parker was just amazing, I haven't seen many displays like that.
You hate to mention anyone in the same breath as Dave Mackay, who was one of finest players at this club, but it was right up there with the best. Dave would have been proud of that performance. He won every tackle, he broke things up, his all round play was top class. He's made a big difference."

Even allowing for a little post win euphoria it is not quite clear whether Harry is saying that Parker is as good as Mackay though he hints at it here. Parker has certainly made a difference. How good Dave Mackay would have been under modern conditions, faster pace; more technical skills; new rules which might limit his effectiveness, you can only guess at.

Fans have taken these words and their cue from Harry to go just a little overboard on just how good Scotty is and how big an impact he has made. To say, as some are, that Parker has taken over from Modric as the key influence on recent games will certainly upset the Kent Pub Modric Appreciation Society

But to me Modric even against QPR was the 'go to' midfielder out of defence and he was the initiator of most of the play. He played the leading part and Parker was outstanding in a supporting role: Modric as the architect and Parker as the demolition and site clearing gang if you will.

Quite where Dave Mackay fits in I'm not sure. It's like one of those unanswerable questions as to whether Rocky Marciano was the greatest heavyweight of all time. Unless you can put him in the ring with his rivals it's all opinion, assertion and statistics.

Rubin Kazan.
Thursday sees us, well the second eleven, away in deepest Tartarstan for our most difficult Europa fixture this year. The temperature is forcast to be -4 and should be a new experience for all but Pavlyuchenko.

Harry, inventive as ever has discovered a rotation system he can cope with: two almost seperate squads, one for the Premiership and a.n.other for the rest. A draw would be a very good result and put us on the verge of qualificationfor the next stage It will be interesting to see who is asked to make the 2003.6 mile trip from WHL. Defoe, Gallas,Sandro and Gomes might draw the short straws.



 Dave Mackay and Billy Bremner. Iconic stuff.
Don't try this at home