The Blog that's not always wrong.

Friday, 21 December 2012

AVB cannot be serious

 Any of you Elves speak Portuguese?
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The Greg Meyer Column
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 Friday Three Sleeps To Christmas 2012.
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A White Christmas At The Lane ... News From The North Pole.
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The busiest place currently on the planet is the HQ of Claus Enterprises somewhere within a well placed free kick of the North Pole. It is here that processing and delivery of the myriad of Christmas orders is in full swing.
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And of course imagine if you will our roving reporter calmly seated before the CEO's desk, a desk piled high with Christmas Wish Lists from all over the footballing globe.Fortunately our man is highly skilled in the dark art of upside down writing reading.There in a neatly typed working document, on notepaper emblazoned with the letterhead 'North Pole Productions', is the following content ...
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All I Want For Christmas Is ...

No doubt a band of secretarial elves have collated requests from various EPL managers. A memorandum. Respective wish lists appear as well as addended notes and comments from the elves and the main man himself.
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Manchester United.
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That people stop telling me I have your nose. Otherwise with Robin Van Persie surely all my Christmases have come at once. Thank you Arsene and to think I thought he didn't like me. On top at Christmas, say no more.
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                                  A.F.
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Manchester City.
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A gifted sports psychologist fluent in Italian would be welcome. If that meant sorting a certain Mario Volatelli striker and no need to buy further then significant savings regards Financial Fair Play would flow. Might help regards that ninety three million pound loss. Still our pub accountant remains cynical. After all just ship in a club advertiser a la PSG style from Dubai and problem solved regards FFP.
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                                R.M.
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Liverpool.
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Daniel Sturridge and Thomas Ince (boomerang included). I have also enclosed a second and sealed envelope and ask that the player named therein be moved on. The envelope trick seemed to have some success for A.F. in his younger days.
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                               B.R.  desperately so.
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Arsenal.
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Anyone that can score goals, Dutch hopefully. Klaus Huntealar would seem to have promise given that christian name. Really likely to be a poor mans Van Persie. Still if you can see your way clear much appreciated. Surely I have points on board after all that largess to United and City.Robin, Sammi, Gail, etc
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                             A.W.  stupidly so say a lot of Arsenal fans.
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Chelsea.

A striker preferably non Spanish. Falcao anyone.I suppose with my very own Russian Father Christmas this letter is somewhat overkill. Yes Arsene sold Van Persie but why O why did we not keep Didier.
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                            R.de M. with follow up letter from R.B.
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Spurs.
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Moutinho and Llorente.  Elf footnote. Elves fall about in paroxyms of laughter.
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Okay a clever public relations ploy by Chairman Levy fooled some regards Moutinho and the nearly signing. Still you gather our drift. No Louis Saha nor a Ryan Nelson. No Harry Redknapp buying either.
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Still it is the time of fairy tales. Llorente...never.
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                          A.V. B. really not that desperately given lots back from injury.
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Newcastle.
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Most miracle workers are either on missionary work in deepest Africa this time of year or those of a footballing variety are packing for the Cup of Nations. Newcastle probably had all their christmases last year. An incredible run made all the  more achievable by lack of much injury to key players. A thin squad beset with injury this time in will need more than magic from Santa.
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                        A.P. just hoping to stay up and hoping Arsene's christmas wish regards Demba Ba is unfulfilled.
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At this point heavy footsteps coming his way put an end to further reading. Still there are 3 more sleeps and then some time before the Transfer window opens. Interesting time Christmas particularly 
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At A Kent Pub.
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A good win over Swansea and very watchable with no late giveaways. Perhaps Vertonghen to centre back was no coincidence.
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Our other Belgian just further enhanced his status at our pub. Berba who? Luka who?  Moussa Dembele a joy to watch.
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Before we go whilst he is also growing on us you wonder whether anyone listens to those tactical talks. Well Benny wouldn't but here's another AVBism.
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"... you put yourself physically in profit for the team." espn. Something to do with trying your guts out on the pitch I guess.
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Festive Cheers ... dear Santa a win over Stoke means Christmas above you know who ... Greg Meyer.                     coys.
Jimmy's Video Spot. 
Spurs 50 greatest players. 10 minutes of nostalgia, snow, grainy footage, just in time for Xmas Enjoy. Another offering from Spurs Community courtesy of Alamo via You tube. After this video stops there is a further link to the next batch.

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