It's not Rocket Science: Any Dope can do it.

 You've got to be sure.
Otherwise Shearer will roast us on MOTD.

 Yes Mr. Clattenburg it's definitely e=mc2

 .

The Greg Meyer Column

.

 Snowday 19 January 2013.

.

It's Not Rocket Science .. Any Dope Can Do It.

.

The art of Spanish waitering suddenly seemed a far more palatable occupation after the second Southampton goal on Wednesday. Even rumours of Franz Klammer, Austrian skiing great, gracing the slopes here at our pub this weekend appear to have more credibility than your average Chelsea fan's faith in Rafa Benitez. Rocket science would seem well out of reach.

 .

 Still according to the bible Redknapp seemingly any intellectually challenged being, Andre Villas Boas aside, will succeed at Chelsea. Harry confirmed he, Andre, was not a dope last week. Thanks for that little pearl Harry. I guess after his holding efforts against us Harry is disqualified from dope status as well.

.

Our publican accepted some high class hospitality on Wednesday viewing the match from a Debenture Box immediately below the comfortable surrounds of a certain Russian oligarch's perch. Yes Roman was at the game confirms mine host.

.

 As to the game all that you read was accurate. Particularly the approbation of the home fans towards the waiter and his sidekick Fernando. Why a going well Lampard was substituted had but one answer. The owner's tentacles are all pervading, direct or otherwise. Still the Interim .. Caretaker .. Seat Warmer has our best wishes against Arsenal.

.

The Chelsea result was very welcome. Spurs are theoretically in it for third. Our pub still not inclined to commit after last years meltdown. Some more distance over Arsenal would be handy given the nature of the opposition at the Lane on Sunday, weather permitting.

.

 At least Franz won't have any difficulties getting there. More on that in a moment but just briefly back to the science of rockets and refereeing.

.

Any Referee Can Do It.

.

Disbelief clothed in disillusionment seems an all too headline lately. Oh alright further back than that. The world's second hardest job. Rocket scientology obviously the first.

.

In most recent memory the Bale diving decision by Martin Atkinson was a blunder. Next up Demba Ba against Swansea. Never a dive Anthony Taylor. Even Andre Marriner stuffed it up blatantly very recently. Phil Dowd anyone. Certainly not for Sam Allardyce.

.

Not a rant but more an expression of regret. s you enter the ground it's not " I wonder who's starting?". No its usually "I just hope he does not bugger up the game and affect the outcome.". 

.

And so to one of those games blessed with refereeing controversy more often than not. Come on down Chris Foy. Yes he of the highway robbery at Stoke vs Spurs last year. Probably need more than a degree in rocketolgy on Sunday.

.

At A Kent Igloo.

.

Still serving . Indeed with schools closed and work difficult to get to it was a busy day here today. People walk or ski and so tend to treat themselves, leaving the skis behind for the home journey.

.

Guarded optimism here for Sunday. Surely Vertonghen can keep Van Persie sufficiently quiet. Sandro's rugged presence will be missed. Little Scotty will try hard but sorry no Sandro. 

.

We now have three world class players and all are available. Hugo Lloris, Gareth Bale and the aforementioned Jan Vertonghen will be needed. Not to gainsay the rest of a team threatening to have a very good season.

.

Haven't bothered with statistics but the last time we probably did the double against Manchester United neither Werner von Braun nor Franz Klammer were even born.
.
 Cheers ...you never know AVB might have studied rocket science at school ... our last manager dear old 'Arry couldn't even spell it on his own admission ... Greg Meyer.    coys. 

.
Jimmy's footnote. Last double over Man. Utd was in 1989/1990 season. We do the research so you don't have to.
 .
.

Jimmy's Video Spot.
Especially for Mine Host at the Kent Igloo, footage of Hugo Lloris defying all comers. Currently my favorite player and the less he has to do the more we like him.

.