Well Sir, sure I wouldn't start from here in the first place.
The JimmyG2 Column.
.Where do we begin after Sunday. We got beat 4-1 against the champions last week but I took more positives than negatives from the game. There were signs that Mauricio was getting through.
This week the reverse is true. We dominated the first half but didn't create much. Ade's goal barely justified his selection. That Rose, and another home grown, Mason were our best players gives some idea of the lack of quality available.
Their equaliser within six seconds, six seconds I ask you, of the second half restart was a blow from which we didn't have the resolve to recover. A rookie playing poorly headed their winner and Vertonghen hardly made a challenge.
Pochettino wasn't even back to his seat for their first goal and Dier was somewhere else entirely. Newcastle got a roasting at half time, made substitutions and were out, warmed up and waiting. We were caught stone cold and not for the first time.
'Tardy' as my old headmaster used to say of me doesn't quite have the ring of modernity. Try these: crawling, creeping, dallying, dawdling, dilatory, dillydallying, dragging, lagging, languid, leisurely, sluggish, snail-paced, unhurried.
Well we were one up after all and Newcastle are relegation fodder so what's the hurry. We lack mental and physical pace all over the pitch, Lloris excluded and even he was on the back foot for Ameobi's goal.
This was always going to be a year of transition and I entertained no illusions other than Pochettino bedding in and shaping them up and shipping some out. But with one win in seven in the Premiership and 11th place in the league things become more urgent by the week.
The Premiership table makes grim reading even at this stage. It's not two from eight obviously but all our alleged rivals are above us including Liverpool, Everton and Man. Utd who have all supposed to have made 'disastrous' starts.
We are three above the relegation zone and five below West Ham who are in the last Champions' League spot. We are cast adrift in the dangerous bottom half shallows and my prediction of a six place finish is looking ridiculously optimistic.
We are bungee jumping but someone forget to secure the rope. Whether we blame Daniel Levy, Mauricio, Baldini, Jermaine Jenas or the tea lady is a matter of judgement and opinion. After pre-season and nine games it is hard to blame the coach though he has not helped himself at times.
Appointing Kaboul as captain was probably not wise given his injury record and tendency to errraticism. There are talks of cliques in the dressing room and favourites on the team sheet. This is mainly journo gossip. Spanish speaking players talk to each other in Spanish, shock.
But Poch needs a year or two to implement his plans and genuine efforts made to supply his wants and needs in the transfer window. No more pathetic 'third party' excuses and shortsighted penny pinching.
Adebayor with an upset stomach played ahead of Kane and Soldado both of whom impressed recently. But our problems are more deep seated and go further back than Pochettino's foibles.
Levy has form on a number of counts. Not fixing the roof when the sun was shining as the Tories were fond of saying.. The time to invest was during the Harry Redknapp Champions' league years.
The knives are not out for him yet, just being sharpened in readiness. The mutterings are getting louder, protests are mooted and even elements of the press have turned on him. The teflon coating might just be starting to flake off.
We sold the heart of the team over recent years and any of the team with heart, and failed to replace key players going back to Berbatov. Moreover if you change your manager every six minutes you are building a house without foundations.
We have an unbalanced squad, light on strikers and overloaded with moderate midfielders. We splashed the Bale cash but not prudently.
That Harry Kane has emerged as a serious contender for a starting place and Ryan Mason has joined Bentaleb, injured at the moment, as a regular in midfield is a tribute to our own grown production line and fills me with pride and, fatally, hope.
Rose already first choice has seen off Davies. Paulinho has slipped quietly beneath the waves. Fazio and Chiriches, have been observed drowning not waving. Capoue after Sunday looks to be floating towards them with a faulty life-belt.
It calls into doubt the quality of those purchased in the post Bale spending spree and the judgement of those making the calls. Compound that with our third manager in a year and you have the makings of a disaster.
Early days perhaps but even in a season of transition you need to see some firmly based progress. As the country gentleman said; Top four? Well I wouldn't start from here in the first place.We have been treading water whilst others have progressed.
It wouldn't be a problem if Levy didn't have such an itchy trigger finger. Bottom half at Easter and Mauricio will be leaving instructions to his household: 'Don't answer the phone it might be for me'.
Lose tomorrow and,or Sunday and the fans will be out in the kitchen rattling those pots and pans especially the ones with non stick coatings.
However I am confident we will win both. Crisis averted for another week. Don't answer the phone Mauricio if we happen to lose both.
Jimmy's Video Spot. Best viewed on mute;
Well life at Spurs is not all gloom and doom. In the Europa we put five past Asteras in the Harry and Erik show. Lloris was sent off and Harry went in goal. The rest is history as is Harry's goalkeeping career. Laugh before you cry.