The Blog that's not always wrong.

Friday, 20 March 2015

A Smoking Gun at The Lane

 'If you can keep your head' the season is not over yet.
The Greg Meyer Column
Sir Walter Raleigh Day   20 March 2015.

A Smoking Gun at The Lane.
My most vivid memory of Leicester City , a “smoking gun “ moment,  occurred recently on Saturday 24 January at the 90th minute . Michel Vorm was left stranded staring at a smoking gun held by Jeff Shlupp. Spurs 1-Leicester 2. More properly called a “Michel Vorm “ moment.

Sir Walter Raleigh has a lot to answer for. Born in East Budleigh, Devon and apparently an adventurous sort when he turned out for ye olde Budleigh United. Budleigh have him immortalized with a Statue in the village. Very fashionable at lots of football grounds.

 British Tobacco paid for the statue and thereby hangs a tale. Sir Wal  Sailed home from Virginia on Sunday 27 July 1586 with a brand new product that was to take the world by storm. 

Before  coming home from the Colonies  Sir Walter rang  his boss in London, Sir Bob Newhart. The conversation went a little like this from Sir Bob’s end.

“ Its nutty Wal again.

   You have another winner Wal? … tobacco?  What’s tobacco Wal. A leaf … you’ve bought 80 tons of leaves.

What do you do with tobacco Wal?

 You can shred it, put it in paper, roll it up and put it between your lips. And then what Wal.

And then you set fire to it Wal.”

The cigarette was introduced to England. Smoking entered the dictionary as did smoking and guns. There is no official word on whether Michel Vorm was a smoker. Probably not given his status as an elite athlete. Still it doesn’t worry Jack Wiltshire.

 What is certain is that after the “smoking gun “ moment against Leicester he gave up . The dangers of guns, smoking and a combination of both is well documented.

Back to that moment against the Foxes. The shooter, Jeff Schlupp, prodded the ball in a gentle lob, arcing innocently towards Michel. Arriving in the “safe “ hands of our Dutch number two the watching throng then witnessed a Shane Warne nightmare.

 It may as well have been a hand grenade. Whatever the ball, hitherto harmless, squirmed slowly and horribly from the keeper’s gloves and unbelievably across the goal line. A googly. Never! They wouldn’t know how to spell cricket in the Netherlands.

Our group were devastated. It was a difficult tube ride back into London surrounded by happy Leicester fans. Consolation beckoned with a great meal at Richoux’s in Picadilly followed by the “The 39 Steps” at the nearby Criterion. But  that smoking gun moment still hurts. Out of the FA Cup.

Revenge, apparently a dish best eaten cold, looms on Saturday. New smoking regulations however won’t eradicate the prospect of another smoking gun moment at the Lane. Hugo Lloris should help there though.


The shooting star that is Harry Edward Kane of Chingford continues in the ascendancy. Our pub have run a gamut of emotions with Harry over the past  twelve months.

Early scepticism, guarded optimism, awakening belief, emerging disbelief, mounting joy and ecstacy against Arsenal. We are almost true believers. Perhaps we have become superstitious, greedy for more. I mean with no other striker on the go then the pressure on our man is enormous.

 Of course he will now score his first England goal. Just after a brace against Leicester. And won’t they believe then …

At A Kent Pub.

There was no smoking gun at Old Trafford. More like a damp squib. Our touted young guns showed some weakness. Youth is not always all. The inconsistency of form and the  inability to perform on the big stage week in week out are all part of the youthful learning curve.

Leicester at the Lane is not as big a stage. Especially when fourth spot hopes have been severely dented. Still the optimism of youth keep emerging. Nabil Bentaleb opining this week we are still in for it.

So on the day that Sir Walter was released from The Tower of London let's hope the shackles are off Spurs tomorrow.

Cheers … mind he died 2 years later .. not from smoking but the small matter of execution by beheading … Greg Meyer.     coys. 

Jimmy's Video Spot. 
Bob Newhart: The tobacco sketch.
Big in the sixties and still going strong. Remind you of anything?

1 comment:

Cheshuntboy said...

Smoking gun? Sir Walter Raleigh? I think the author of this load of tripe has been on something much stronger than tobacco - if you've got nothing to say, say nothing!

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